I feel bad

You know, I tried hard in the early part of the month, almost as if I knew in my bones that I wouldn't be able to by the end. The situation is that I can't really eat, can't sleep much, and can't move around because my head starts spinning every time I do.

The voice in my head that says "You Have Things To Do, Missy, So Get A Move On!" isn't making me feel any better. Now, I know I should have called in about this situation, but I also know they're going to say that there's nothing wrong with me. Either that or they'll check me back into the hospital. I don't want that; what I want is to get a tree this afternoon and watch movies with a friend who's coming to visit.

There really could be nothing wrong with me (there could!) and I know I should call. I told Rob I would and then I didn't, because I'm stubborn and I thought maybe I'd feel better in the morning.

"In the morning" means today. I do feel a little better. (Read: I don't feel as bad as I did last night.) I drank some water and ate a handful of dry Corn Chex, and so far that's stayed down. On the other hand, I've lost six kilos since Wednesday, with no additional symptoms that say this is stomach flu, food poisoning, or anything else that might cause gastric weirdness such as I've had over the past two days.

So on one hand, I really want to go back to bed and lay quietly, clutching a pillow to my midsection. On the other hand I want to go to the mall and finish my shopping.

Really, what I want is to feel better so I can stop a) whining because this must be getting as tedious to read as it is to feel; and b) so I can enjoy the holiday with my friends and family. That would be good. I'm trying hard to find an up side to this, but so far it's not happening.

before - after