Not available in any store

The other day, Krapsnart postulated what her cats would say on IRC, assuming that they would type in all caps. I don't really think my Lola would type in all caps, in fact, I don't think she'd IRC at all.

Lola is more about insinuating herself into your lap, and she really doesn't want to share your attention with anything, especially not a computer.

So, she'd say something like this.

Your allergies are not my problem. Let's talk about me! Which of my features do you think is cutest? Is it my colorful coat? My big white paws with red toenails? Did you know that I have one black toe and one black whisker? Isn't that charming? How about my fetching black nose? Don't you think I make the cutest noises ever? I make them extra loud so you can hear them. Maybe you like my tufted ears or my soft, inviting belly. You're kind of funny looking for a cat, you know... do you have a snack for me? No? Fine, I'm going to run up and down stairs now.

The problem with cats, I think, is that there are many, many cats but only one universe. This may cause confusion, even collision. That can't be good.

I took a test at about.com to determine what kind of cat I am. It says, without hesitation, that I am a Persian. I'm not sure what that's supposed to mean, but I hold it in direct opposition to the test on thespark.com that said with 86% certainty that I am a guy. Huh?

I've been watching infomercials the last couple of nights when I couldn't sleep, and I find it fairly disturbing that they prey on the idea of change. As if the only way to change is to spend $100 or more on a product from teevee. I admit that real change is difficult to accomplish, but I don't think you can get the motivation to do so from something you bought over an 800 number in the middle of the night.

Any time I've ever really changed, television has had nothing to do with it. That doesn't mean that you shouldn't buy Victoria Principle's life-changing skin care or Tony Robbins motivational tapes, or Tae-Bo, or the revolutionary toothbrush with ultrasound, but consider that the change comes when you turn off the teevee.

It's a thought, anyway. Another thought is that tomorrow I will take a day off from hanging around the house cleaning, then feeling tired. I might go to a movie or something like that. I don't really care what, just as long as it gets me out of the house and doesn't involve doctors in any way.

before - after