Fifty-seven channels and nothing on

QVC is the most interesting, because you can buy regular stuff there along with the made for teevee crap. I've spotted a few things I actually own on QVC, and let me tell you, I've been taken aback.

Now, tonight while I was dealing with my fluids, I watched as "socialite Blaine Trump" hawked her collection of accessories, where "accessories" is defined as handbags, totebags and oddly beaded sweater sets.

I was interested in the interaction between the hostess woman--a Normal American Gal type named Mary-Something--and Blaine Trump, who is possibly the WASPiest woman on Earth. She's like Martha Stewart without the cooking and gardening, whose major accomplishment seems to be getting her picture in W fairly often.

OK, right, so I'm watching QVC for sociological reasons. Really.

Now, if you've ever watched a shopping channel, you know that they take callers from time to time; it's for testimonials and stuff, and it's usually rather amusing. So tonight, between the Nadines from Oklahoma and the Joannes from South Carolina were Lynda Carter and Joan Rivers. We were supposed to believe that they were just watcing QVC with the rest of us, ordering these nylon tote bags for $35 plus shipping and handling and decided to call in to chat. OK, well, Joan said she got hers last week.

I guess that women who are famous for being famous have to stick together, don't they? Somehow, I think that's not a club I'd really want to join.

before - after