The thrill of victory, etc

There's something wrong. It's probably not anything major, but I'm worrying about it just the same. I'm supposed to worry; this is a very strange state of being for me. Not that I'm any stranger to worrying, but historically when I've worried about something people have told me to calm down, that I'm overreacting. Now I have a bunch of doctors who tell me it's good that I called.

To make a long story short, I have to go in tomorrow instead of Tuesday. I am fully emotionally prepared for something to be wrong enough that they will want to keep me, although I think they'd probably just as soon send my smiling face home.

I happened to see a teevee show on The Learning Channel (AKA the It Blowed Up Real Good Network) that featured a story about four people in Los Angeles who received transplanted organs from the same donor. Watching, I realized why everybody has been saying almost from the moment I woke up that I look great.

Because I do.

The guys in this story looked bad. They were all middle aged and very thin; one was still in a wheelchair, another was on oxygen. This was a month after their surgeries. I was shocked at the way they looked, still so fragile.

My surgery was a month ago today; honestly, if you didn't know I got a new kidney and pancreas a month ago, you couldn't guess by looking at me. I look young, healthy, even vital. I get tired easily; I know I do too much and I'm not as strong as I pretend to be, but I also think that believing I'm getting better is helping me to get better.

OK, what I bought today: Rob and I went to Saks to try to find what he described as Gay Man's Pants, by which he meant basic pants in a decent fabric, that are reasonably stylish but not dress pants. He didn't find any pants that were exactly what he wanted, so he didn't buy anything.

On the other hand, I scored two Nars eye shadows that make me very happy. Night Star is unbelievably difficult to come by; it's a peachy-beige with bright white sparkles, just gorgeous. On a lark, I also picked up Night Bird, a medium smoky grey with a red-violet shimmer. Mmmmmmm. Night Bird will look fabulous with Too Faced Ego, the shimmery mauve that I've fallen in love with lately; Night Star looks all-around fabulous.

So, next week, I'm going to try to start walking two miles each day, as opposed to the one mile I've been doing recently. It's going to be really cold, so I don't know how well that will work, but I'm going to try.

This is rehab, people. Woohoo.

before - after