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Mortality, this is Reality
Well, the fake tree is fully fluffed out now, and I guess it's OK. We haven't put the ornaments on yet, but before about an hour ago it wasn't fully fluffed. I haven't gone out to stock up on candles and potpourri quite yet, because I'm not exactly sure where to go. I tend not to frequent shops that you can smell a block away.... with the noteable exception of Lush.
I need a Lush fix, meaning that I need to be in a store breathing in the mixture of scents and knowing that I'll be soaking in a beautiful bath very soon. It's just not the same as ordering online and knowing that I can soak in soft, fragrant water (with glitter, if I want it) in a matter of days. In the mean time, I'm stocked up on my very favorite Lush things: Potion lotion, Silky Underwear powder and Skinny Dip shower gel. Mmmmmm.
I know that my regular readers, especially my long-time readers have been following the seemingly never-ending saga of "What's Up With Koog's Health?" (I have got to come up with a better title for the saga.) Anyway, y'all might be interested in a bunch of articles about kidney transplantation I thought it was interesting, anyway. My mom said she couldn't read some of it.
My potential donor may be hedging, which I guess I understand. I am trying not to ask why I can't get somebody who's just determined to be helpful, because apparently there are such folks out in the world. Apparently I am not acquainted with any of them.
I am feeling better. As I said in a note to the potential donor, I have good days and bad days; the bad days make the good days seem much better. There's no coincidence that "bad days" line up almost exactly with days when I have dialysis.
See, I'm not kidding when I say I don't know how long I will last on dialysis. I might be able to wait out how long it will take me to get another cadaver kidney, but I might not. That's reality, kids. You're better off in a world where you don't have to face your own mortality when you're 35. There are times when I wish I could go back.
In the mean time, I found the perfect bear for Maya in Germany on ebay.
She's three years old, she loves cuddly stuffed animals, and I'd been looking online to no avail. I saw the photo and I just knew that was the bear. It's a soft white mohair Steiff bear. I know that her father won't let her destroy it out of respect for my Steiff bears. The rest of the gifts I have to buy for this year are either bought or picked out. They are not mailed and I haven't wrapped a thing, but the buying part is near it's end.
See, the present isn't all that bad.
12.13.2001, Afternoon comments (0)